Page not found – Dr. Taji Huang PhD https://www.drtaji.com Glendale Psychologist, Therapy, & Counseling Thu, 21 Mar 2024 17:46:56 +0000 en-US hourly 1 5 Ways To Focus On Self-Care During Divorce https://www.drtaji.com/5-ways-to-focus-on-self-care-during-divorce/ Thu, 21 Mar 2024 17:46:56 +0000 https://www.drtaji.com/?p=1515 Embarking on the journey through a divorce can be one of life’s most challenging experiences. It’s a time filled with significant changes, emotional upheavals, and, often, a profound sense of loss. However, amidst these turbulent times, it’s crucial to remember the importance of self-care. Prioritizing your well-being can pave the path to healing and resilience. […]

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Embarking on the journey through a divorce can be one of life’s most challenging experiences. It’s a time filled with significant changes, emotional upheavals, and, often, a profound sense of loss.

However, amidst these turbulent times, it’s crucial to remember the importance of self-care. Prioritizing your well-being can pave the path to healing and resilience. Dr. Taji Huang, Ph.D., emphasizes the need for self-care during these trying times. Self-care is more than just a buzzword; it’s a vital strategy for navigating the intricate process of divorce with your health and sanity intact.

Dr. Huang guides you through five key ways to focus on self-care amidst the chaos of separation and divorce, ensuring that you emerge stronger and more compassionate towards yourself.

Importance of Self-Care During Divorce

Divorce is a challenging life event, packed with a whirlwind of emotions and adjustments. During this turbulent time, it’s easy to neglect your own well-being. However, embracing self-care is not just beneficial; it’s essential for navigating through this period with resilience and grace. Self-care involves activities and practices that we choose to engage in on a regular basis to reduce stress and enhance our well-being.

How To Define Self-Care

Self-care refers to the deliberate actions we take to care for our physical, mental, and emotional health. It is a critical aspect of maintaining a balanced life, especially during stressful life events like divorce. Self-care isn’t selfish or indulgent; it’s a necessary component of healing and recovery.

By focusing on self-care during separation and divorce, you’re giving yourself the tools needed to cope with stress, emotional pain, and the upheaval that accompanies the end of a marriage.

Links Between Self-Care And Wellness During Separation

The connection between self-care and overall well-being during divorce cannot be overstated. Divorce can lead to sleep disturbances, changes in appetite, and heightened levels of stress and anxiety. Incorporating self-care strategies into your daily routine can mitigate these effects, helping you to maintain a sense of normalcy and balance

By taking care of your body, mind, and spirit, you’re better equipped to handle the legal, financial, and emotional aspects of divorce with clarity and strength.

Self-Care Tips For Divorce Recovery

Navigating through a divorce requires attention to self-care. Here are five practical ways to incorporate self-care into your life during this difficult time.

1. Practice Mindfulness And Meditation

Mindfulness and meditation can be powerful tools in managing the stress and emotional turmoil of divorce. By focusing on the present moment and accepting your feelings without judgment, you can achieve a sense of calm and centeredness. Even a few minutes of meditation each day can significantly reduce stress levels and improve your overall emotional well-being.

2. Seek Support From Professionals Like Therapists Or Counselors

One of the most effective forms of self-care during divorce is seeking the support of a professional. A mental health professional who specializes in divorce and separation can provide you with a safe space to express your feelings, offer guidance, and help you navigate your emotional journey. In Glendale, CA, services like those provided by Dr. Taji Huang, Ph.D., can be invaluable resources for individuals going through a divorce.

3. Maintain A Healthy Routine For Eating And Sleeping

The stress of divorce can lead to sleep deprivation and poor nutrition, which only compounds the emotional and physical toll. It’s important to prioritize a healthy routine that includes nutritious meals and adequate sleep. Creating and sticking to a regular eating and sleeping schedule can help stabilize your mood, improve your energy levels, and bolster your immune system.

4. Engage In Physical Activities For Stress Relief

Physical activity is a proven stress reliever and mood booster. Exercise releases endorphins, which are natural mood lifters, and can help maintain mental balance. Whether it’s a brisk walk, a yoga class, or a workout at the gym, find an activity that you enjoy and make it a part of your regular routine. Not only will it help relieve stress, but it’s also a constructive way to channel your energy and emotions.

5. Take Time For Self-Reflection And Self-Compassion

Divorce can lead to feelings of failure, guilt, or loss. It’s important to practice self-compassion and allow yourself time and space for self-reflection. Acknowledge your feelings without self-criticism and remind yourself that it’s okay to not be okay. This period of self-reflection can also be a time of growth, helping you to understand your needs, desires, and the direction you want your life to take post-divorce.

Begin Your Post-Divorce Healing Journey

Focusing on self-care when going through a divorce is not only essential for your immediate well-being but also for laying the foundation of a healthy, optimistic future. By practicing mindfulness, seeking professional support, maintaining a healthy routine, engaging in physical activities, and allowing time for self-reflection and compassion, you can navigate this challenging journey with resilience and grace. Remember, taking care of yourself isn’t a luxury—it’s a necessity.

If you find yourself seeking support from a Glendale therapist, Dr. Huang can provide you with a safe space to process your feelings and develop healthy coping strategies tailored to your unique situation. Divorce counseling is not a sign of weakness, but rather courage as you take a step toward healing and rediscovering your strength.

Remember, this period, though challenging, is temporary, and with the right tools and support, you’ll emerge stronger. Take care of yourself—you deserve it.

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7 Benefits Of Online Counseling https://www.drtaji.com/7-benefits-of-online-counseling/ Thu, 15 Feb 2024 18:29:18 +0000 https://www.drtaji.com/?p=1496 Technology has pervasively permeated all aspects of life, and the field of mental health is far from an exception. This seamless blend of technology and counseling has given birth to online therapy, which brings with it numerous benefits. Primarily, online counseling provides individuals with mental health issues an opportunity to seek help from the comfort […]

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Technology has pervasively permeated all aspects of life, and the field of mental health is far from an exception. This seamless blend of technology and counseling has given birth to online therapy, which brings with it numerous benefits.

Primarily, online counseling provides individuals with mental health issues an opportunity to seek help from the comfort of their familiar surroundings. This paints a promising picture of accessible global mental health care.

1. Convenience & Flexibility

An overarching attribute of conventional therapy is the need to travel to a therapist’s office. This is especially true for individuals who may have anxiety about driving or riding in cars.

In contrast, online counseling services provide therapy sessions where and when it suits the individual. This level of convenience is beneficial for a lot of people.

  • Individuals with health issues impacting their mobility.
  • Those who live in remote areas or lack access to transportation.
  • People with demanding work-life balance.
  • People with fears about being in unfamiliar locations.
  • Anyone who has concerns about privacy and anonymity.

Also, online therapy offers flexibility. Appointments are easier to schedule and reschedule, and ‘waiting room’ anxiety gets eliminated.

2. Promotes Accessibility & Helps Overcome Stigmas

Unfortunately, seeking help for a mental health problem often comes with a certain social stigma. For those wrestling with this predicament, virtual sessions can offer a level of anonymity that encourages openness. The relative anonymity helps reduce the mental or emotional barriers that can occasionally interfere with progress in traditional face-to-face therapy. Also, therapists who offer online counseling work hard to ensure their services are accessible to everyone. This means a reduction of typical therapy obstacles that can stop someone from getting consistent help.

3. Can Be More Cost-Effective Than Traditional Therapy

In contrast to traditional face-to-face therapy, online counseling can often be more cost-effective. Even better, many insurance companies now cover virtual counseling and E-therapy sessions, which reduces the burden of health care costs significantly.

4. Online Mental Healthcare Leverages Technology

The use of digital therapy platforms means individuals have access to mental health support in ways that weren’t previously possible. Innovations in teletherapy apps, secure messaging, and online support groups expand the reach of mental health care, ensuring enhanced patient empowerment.

Additionally, the documentation of therapy sessions allows for more comprehensive psychiatric consultation. It also aids in mood tracking, which is a helpful tool in cognitive behavioral therapy procedures.

5. Teletherapy Provides A Wide Range of Services

Online counseling services offer a variety of professional services. Whether it’s relationship issues, work-related stress, depression, or anxiety, online therapy can provide unparalleled support.

  • Cognitive Behavioral Therapy
  • Trauma-Informed Care
  • Online Psychotherapy
  • Resilience Building – Targeting Personal Growth & Life Transitions
  • Stress Management & Coping Strategies
  • Crisis Intervention

6. Online Therapy Is Continually Evolving

Telehealth regulations are continually adapting and evolving to make mental health services more accessible while maintaining utmost confidentiality. Today’s online therapy includes video sessions, chat-based therapy, and self-help tools. This allows clients to choose the format they’re most comfortable with, enhancing the overall effectiveness of therapy.

7. Confidential & Private

Professional online therapy platforms adhere to strict privacy policies. Clients’ personal data and therapy sessions are securely stored and are immune from the prying eyes of odd marketers.

Of course, any sessions you have with licensed therapists are just as confidential as in-person sessions.

Embrace Online Counseling Today

The Internet has revolutionized how we approach mental health, and there’s no reason not to take advantage of this shift. If you’re in Glendale, CA, allow Dr. Taji Huang to guide you through your journey to emotional wellness.

Online counseling works just as well as in-person therapy or as an extension of in-person sessions. Whether it’s stress, anxiety, depression, or simply a desire for personal growth, online counseling can be your partner in fostering positive change. Embrace the flexibility and convenience it offers. Conquer your fears and stigma, and step onto the path of mental health and resilience with online therapy.

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Does Social Media Promote Self Harm? https://www.drtaji.com/does-social-media-promote-self-harm/ Thu, 14 Dec 2023 00:08:16 +0000 https://www.drtaji.com/?p=1465 The increasing impact of social media on our daily lives, particularly among the adolescent population, necessitates a deeper understanding of its potential effect on mental health. Of particular interest is the emerging topic of whether social media might promote self-harm among users, specifically those in their formative years. The Correlation Between Social Media & Self-Harm […]

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The increasing impact of social media on our daily lives, particularly among the adolescent population, necessitates a deeper understanding of its potential effect on mental health. Of particular interest is the emerging topic of whether social media might promote self-harm among users, specifically those in their formative years.

The Correlation Between Social Media & Self-Harm

Several research studies have discovered a significant link between the increased use of social media and a rise in self-harming behaviors, particularly among younger people. In this digital age, while social media platforms are often used as tools for communication and entertainment, they can also be a source of detrimental effects on mental health. While social media can have its benefits, it’s crucial to monitor and address the connection between social media usage and self-harming behaviors to keep yourself safe.

This has become increasingly evident among young adults, a demographic that uses social media extensively. As they grow and try to understand the challenges of life, they can often face immense pressure. This pressure is exacerbated by social media and can lead to mental health challenges. Adolescents are particularly susceptible as their minds are still developing, and they may lack the necessary tools to navigate the pressures and potential harms of online spaces, which can lead to more mental health issues later in life.

Self-Injury To Cope With Overwhelming Emotions

One of the most distressing outcomes linked with heavy social media usage is non-suicidal self-injury. This behavior typically involves deliberate hurting of oneself without the intention to die. Vulnerable people may resort to this as a way to cope with overwhelming emotions, and increased exposure to such behavior on social media can normalize it, making it seem like an acceptable way to handle feelings of distress.

Unrealistic Body Images Result In Eating Disorders

The rise in eating disorders has also been notably associated with social media use as well. People can be negatively influenced by unrealistic body images and beauty standards promoted on social media platforms. They might attempt revamping their body image through unhealthy means, leading to conditions like anorexia, bulimia, or other eating disorders.

Constant Exposure To Negative Content Leads To Suicidal Ideation

Another unsettling trend linked with increased social media usage is the surge in depression and suicidal tendencies or thoughts, known as suicidal ideation. The constant exposure to pessimistic content, bullying, or feelings of inadequacy instigated by comparing oneself to influencers or peers online, can lead to such dangerous tendencies.

The Role Of Algorithm In Pushing Self-Harm Content

There are concerns that the algorithms used by major social media platforms may inadvertently promote self-harm by suggesting related content to users already exhibiting signs of emotional distress.

Research findings highlight an interesting, yet concerning, issue — images and content related to self-injury can have an enormous impact, particularly on impressionable users. When people, especially those in a vulnerable state of mind, come across vivid portrayals of self-harm or associated themes, these visuals can considerably influence their perception and feelings about self-injury.

These images can inadvertently romanticize or glorify the act of self-harm, making it seem like a viable option or a form of escape from emotional turmoil. This inadvertently can create a negative cycle where the user might contemplate replicating such behaviors as a method of coping with their own problems.

Social Media, Body Image & Eating Disorders

The role of social media in promoting unhealthy body image perceptions and subsequently leading to eating disorders cannot be ignored. Platforms often act as a breeding ground for comparison, leading to decreased self-worth and an increased risk for disordered eating.

Cyberbullying & Its Impact On Mental Health

The anonymity and distance provided by online social networking can unfortunately enable cyberbullying. This harmful behavior has been linked with significant emotional distress, self-harm, and even suicidal ideation in victims.

How Social Media Platforms Are Addressing Self-Harm

Thankfully, many major social media platforms are taking steps to address harmful content. Instagram, for example, has implemented policies to block self-harm images, while other platforms are developing tools to support users exhibiting signs of mental health challenges.

Knowledge Is Power: Understanding the Potential Impact

Understanding how social media can affect you or your loved one can help you identify potentially harmful behavior. It’s important to:

• Recognize the signs of emotional distress in online behavior.

• Engage in regular conversations about social media and its potential impact.

• Participate in offline activities to balance screen time.

• Seek professional help if concerns about self-harm or mental health arise.

The Power Of Prevention Lies In Awareness

Understanding the link between social media and self-harm can enable you to seek out the help you need to deal with this issue. In Glendale, CA, Dr. Taji Huang, PhD is ready to support you as you navigate this modern-day complex issue.

Being educated, vigilant, and proactive can make all the difference in preventing and addressing these health challenges. Contact Dr. Taji Huang today for further support and guidance.

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Starting A New Relationship After Domestic Violence https://www.drtaji.com/starting-a-new-relationship-after-domestic-violence/ Fri, 17 Nov 2023 20:52:20 +0000 https://www.drtaji.com/?p=1448 Starting a new relationship after experiencing domestic violence can be a complex journey, particularly for individuals who are also dealing with Post Traumatic Stress Disorder (PTSD). As a survivor, you may find challenges and anxieties you’ve never faced before. However, this journey, while difficult, can be navigated with the right support and guidance. Understanding PTSD […]

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Starting a new relationship after experiencing domestic violence can be a complex journey, particularly for individuals who are also dealing with Post Traumatic Stress Disorder (PTSD). As a survivor, you may find challenges and anxieties you’ve never faced before. However, this journey, while difficult, can be navigated with the right support and guidance.

Understanding PTSD & Domestic Violence Recovery

PTSD, commonly experienced by survivors of domestic violence, involves a range of symptoms that can complicate the process of forming a new, healthy relationship. You might be dealing with flashbacks, recurrent thoughts, mood changes, or hypersensitivity to potential threat signals.

Some signs of PTSD that domestic abuse survivors might notice include:

  • Intrusive Thoughts Or Memories: Flashbacks or nightmares of some of the traumatic events you experienced, often triggered by reminders or things associated with the violence.
  • Avoidance Behaviors: Avoiding people, places, or situations that remind you of your domestic violence experience. This can also include avoiding conversations about the event or any related emotions.
  • Hyperarousal Or Hypervigilance: Being on edge, constantly feeling on guard, easily startled, or having difficulty concentrating. This may also lead to difficulties with sleep or irritability.
  • Negative Changes In Thoughts or Mood: Experiencing negative thoughts about yourself, others, or the world. This can include feelings of guilt, shame, or fear. It might also include loss of interest in activities or social withdrawal.
  • Emotional Reactivity: Experiencing intense emotions or emotional “numbing,” where the individual may seem emotionally distant or detached.
  • Physical Symptoms: PTSD can also manifest in physical symptoms such as headaches, stomachaches, or other unexplained pains.

It’s important to note that everyone’s experience with PTSD may vary, and not all individuals will exhibit the same symptoms. If you are experiencing these signs after domestic violence, it is recommended to seek professional help from a mental health provider who specializes in trauma.

Potential Challenges In New Relationships

Entering a new relationship can raise unanticipated issues for a domestic violence survivor. These might include:

  • Trust Issues
  • Fear Of Intimacy
  • Pattern Of Choosing Abusive Partners
  • Difficulty In Setting Boundaries

To navigate these challenges, you should maintain a commitment to ongoing therapy and treatment while you’re dating. This is especially important for survivors of long-term domestic violence.

7 Tips For Safe & Healthy Relationships

Starting a new relationship after experiencing domestic violence can be both exciting and challenging. You might feel ready and even be excited about new dating possibilities.

But it’s important to remember to stay focused on prioritizing your safety and emotional well-being as you embark on this new chapter. By following these seven tips, you can foster a safe and healthy relationship built on trust, respect, and open communication.

1. Focus On Self-Care

Prioritize self-care and healing as you navigate a new relationship. Take time to reflect on your needs, set boundaries, and communicate them with your partner. Engage in activities that bring you joy and promote your overall well-being.

2. Seek Therapy Or Support

Consider attending therapy or joining support groups to work through the trauma of domestic violence. A professional therapist or counselor specializing in relationship dynamics and trauma can provide valuable insights and coping strategies.

3. Build Trust Gradually

Trust is essential in any healthy relationship, but it may take time to rebuild this after experiencing domestic violence or emotional abuse. You should allow trust to develop naturally and at your own pace.

Be sure to communicate openly about your concerns, fears, and expectations. Trustworthy partners will respect your boundaries and offer reassurance.

4. Communicate Effectively

Healthy communication is key to maintaining a safe and nurturing relationship. Always practice open and honest conversations with your partner, expressing your thoughts, needs, and feelings. Also, keep active listening and mutual respect should be at the forefront of your communication.

5. Watch For Red Flags

Educate yourself about unhealthy relationship patterns and behaviors. If you notice any warning signs of control, manipulation, or aggression, trust your instincts and prioritize your safety. Remember, it’s okay to seek support from loved ones or professionals if you have concerns.

6. Take Things Slow

You should always take things at a pace that feels comfortable to you. Allow yourself time to get to know your partner and build a solid foundation of trust and respect. Rushing into intense or codependent relationships may put your safety and well-being at risk.

7. Lean On Your Support System

Surround yourself with a strong support system of friends, family, or support groups. These individuals can provide guidance, support, and a safe space to express your feelings. They can also help you navigate challenges and provide objective perspectives when needed.

The Value of Ongoing Treatment

For domestic abuse survivors, continuing treatment is integral to recovery. It helps you cultivate a healthy relationship and teaches you to practice safe dating.

Treatment not only assists in resolving the symptoms of PTSD. It also helps you understand and break patterns that can lead to a physically and emotionally abusive relationship.

Take Your First Step Today

We understand that moving forward after surviving domestic violence can be challenging. But remember, you have the strength and courage to embark on this journey.

Dr. Taji Huang is here in Glendale, CA, to provide the necessary guidance and therapeutic support to make this process easier. As a survivor, you’ve already demonstrated resilience and bravery. Contact us to take the next step in your healing journey today.

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Ritual Sexual Abuse https://www.drtaji.com/ritual-sexual-abuse/ Fri, 20 Oct 2023 18:15:55 +0000 https://www.drtaji.com/?p=1437 Dr. Taji Huang, based in Glendale, CA, specializes in addressing the aftermath of ritual sexual abuse, a deeply distressing and sensitive topic that leaves survivors with profound psychological scars. With her compassionate and expert approach, Dr. Huang helps survivors navigate the challenging journey of healing. As devastating as its aftermath is, healing from this profound […]

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Dr. Taji Huang, based in Glendale, CA, specializes in addressing the aftermath of ritual sexual abuse, a deeply distressing and sensitive topic that leaves survivors with profound psychological scars. With her compassionate and expert approach, Dr. Huang helps survivors navigate the challenging journey of healing. As devastating as its aftermath is, healing from this profound trauma is possible with enough time and the right therapeutic support.

Defining Ritual Sexual Abuse

This heinous type of abuse occurs within the context of organized rituals or ceremonies—often, but not always, religious in nature. Perpetrators tend to be powerful authority figures, and they often target vulnerable individuals, such as children and devout religious believers, by exploiting their trust, respect, and devotion.

Where Does This Abuse Occur?

Ritualistic sexual abuse usually takes place in very secretive settings, making it challenging to detect and prevent. It may happen within cults, religious institutions, or even within seemingly ordinary families. The abusers use fear, guilt, shame, gaslighting, and other powerful manipulation tactics to keep you from telling others about what happened.

The Fallout For Survivors

Survivors of ritual sexual abuse often face a long and arduous journey to healing, sometimes extending decades after the abuse occurred. The consequences can be both physical and psychological and you may experience them to different degrees.

  • Severe Psychological Trauma
  • Dissociative Experiences
  • Unexplained Physical Ailments
  • Trust Issues
  • Shame, Guilt, Secrecy, & Social Isolation
  • Flashbacks & Nightmares
  • Self-Harm & Suicidal Ideation

Severe Psychological Trauma

Sexual abuse survivors grapple with deep emotional scars, which can cause chronic anxiety, depression, and post-traumatic stress disorder (PTSD). If the trauma occurred during a key developmental period, it can give rise to Complex PTSD (C-PTSD), borderline personality disorder (BPD), and dissociative identity disorder (DID).

Dissociative Experiences

Many survivors experience dissociation, a coping mechanism that detaches you from your own emotions, perceptions, and memories. If it sometimes feels like your body and thoughts are not your own, the world around you isn’t real, you don’t exist, or you’ve “skipped through” or “lost” periods of time, you likely experienced dissociation.

Unexplained Physical Ailments

Sometimes, we might not feel strongly emotionally connected to traumatic events, but that doesn’t mean they didn’t affect us. Oftentimes, people whose trauma response is to unconsciously block out or numb their emotions will instead have aches, pains, fatigue, and other physical symptoms of severe stress.

Trust Issues

Any type of sexual abuse erodes trust, making it extraordinarily difficult for survivors to build healthy relationships. However, ritualistic abuse is especially painful in that it can destroy your once-cherished trust in religion, spirituality, or your own family.

Shame, Guilt, Secrecy, & Social Isolation

Survivors will sometimes unjustly blame themselves for their abuse, carrying a heavy burden of shame and guilt. If the crime was committed by an esteemed community figure or religious leader, it can be even scarier to disclose the truth, for fear that no one will believe you or that you’ll be shunned by your entire community. Regardless of what your abuser told you, what they did was not your fault, and you deserve to seek out a safe and caring community that sides with you instead of your abuser.

Flashbacks & Nightmares

If you’ve lived through trauma, it might feel like you can never truly escape it. Vivid memories and nightmares might plague you constantly, and they feel just as real as the abusive events themselves. These are classic PTSD symptoms, but the good news is that there are many types of therapy specifically designed to target and reduce them.

Self-Harm & Suicidal Ideation

The flashbacks, shame, dissociation, and emotional turmoil of ritualistic sexual abuse are enough to drive anyone to the point of self-harm and even suicide. That being said, it is possible to heal from sexual and religious trauma, and you can take back control of your life. As difficult as it may be to believe right now, there is always hope, and you can turn your life into one you genuinely enjoy living.

How A Trauma-Informed Counselor Can Help

Recovery from ritualistic sexual abuse is a challenging process that requires professional support, understanding, and compassion. Therapists, support groups, medications, and helplines can all provide you with a lifeline for healing. With enough time and support, you can learn how to not just survive but to thrive.

Rebuilding Trust & Self-Worth

Therapy for ritual sexual abuse survivors can play a pivotal role in helping you rebuild trust in yourself and the world around you. A good mental health provider will empower you to challenge negative self-perceptions, providing you with a safe space to work through your trauma at your own pace.

Proven Therapy Options For Ritual Sexual Abuse Survivors

There are many scientifically-backed healing modalities to aid you in your healing journey. Your therapist may recommend some, or you might want to ask about ones that you have heard of before to see if it might work for you.

Healing From Spiritual Trauma

For some ritual sexual abuse survivors, regaining trust in spirituality is a crucial component of therapy. This can involve individually exploring new religions, developing your own form of spirituality, finding other survivors of the same faith, or even reintegrating into a more supportive branch of your old religious community.

Of course, if you no longer tolerate spiritual beliefs at all, that’s completely valid as well—there are plenty of secular, humanist, and atheist support groups out there dedicated to helping people heal from religious trauma.

Empowerment & Resilience

A trauma-informed therapist like Dr. Taji Huang in Glendale, California will help you develop coping mechanisms and find your voice. By carefully revisiting past events, you can ultimately reframe the traumatic memories from a more empowered perspective, freeing yourself from the abuser’s reign once and for all.

What Dr. Taji Huang Can Provide

  • Mental Health Evaluations
  • Trauma-Focused Therapy
  • Safety Planning
  • Family & Relationship Therapy
  • Holistic Healing Approaches
  • Education & Psychoeducation
  • Referrals To Medication Prescribers & Legal Advocates

Reclaim Your Life After Abuse

It’s essential to remember that healing is always possible, even if it doesn’t feel within reach at the moment, and even if past treatments have failed. Although the effects of ritualistic abuse are profound, with the right support, you can build better self-esteem, foster healthy and loving relationships, and be the author of your own life story. Schedule an initial appointment with Dr. Taji Huang today to see if she’s a good fit for you.

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Help! I’m Married To A Narcissist https://www.drtaji.com/married-to-a-narcissist/ Sun, 25 Jun 2023 20:15:40 +0000 https://www.drtaji.com/?p=1291 Coping with a narcissist can be challenging, emotionally draining, and downright exhausting—especially if the person in question is your own spouse or long-term partner. Understanding narcissism, recognizing its signs, and knowing how to navigate this complex dynamic can help you manage your own well-being and figure out the next steps to take. Seeking Admiration & […]

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Coping with a narcissist can be challenging, emotionally draining, and downright exhausting—especially if the person in question is your own spouse or long-term partner. Understanding narcissism, recognizing its signs, and knowing how to navigate this complex dynamic can help you manage your own well-being and figure out the next steps to take.

Seeking Admiration & Lacking Empathy

Narcissism falls on a spectrum, ranging from mild to severe, and a healthy amount of some of its most well-known traits is important for maintaining good self-esteem. It is when those traits exceed healthy amounts and cause issues not only for those around them but also for the person living with it that a professional can begin to diagnose them with a mental health condition.

  • Excessive Need For Attention
  • Lack Of Empathy
  • Manipulative Behavior
  • Grandiose Or Fragile Self-Image
  • Difficulty Taking Responsibility

NPD Is A Lifelong Struggle

Narcissistic personality disorder (NPD) is a psychological condition characterized by an exaggerated sense of self-importance, a constant need for admiration, and a lack of empathy towards others—usually due to persistent, repressed shame endured in early childhood. Like any other personality disorder, it usually follows a person throughout their entire life and causes significant problems for themselves and those around them.

Personality disorders typically manifest in every aspect of a person’s life and are considered central to who they are, so—despite what pop culture would have you believe—not every toxic relationship is due to NPD.

Craving for Validation

A narcissistic spouse craves constant praise and validation, often monopolizing conversations and making everything about themselves, which is understandably quite frustrating for everyone else. Sometimes, they might exaggerate or outright lie about their own accomplishments to impress people.

Struggling With Compassion & Empathy

Narcissists struggle to understand or care about others’ feelings, which is why they have no qualms about dismissing or belittling them. They might be completely oblivious to the fact that you feel hurt or even blame you for feeling that way. Professional help for narcissists is often the only way they can learn how to empathize.

They Manipulate To Get Their Way

People with NPD are skilled at manipulation and may use guilt, gaslighting, or passive-aggressive tactics to control and dominate their partner. It’s important to learn how to recognize these signs so that you can emotionally detach yourself from them if your partner refuses to be held accountable.

Understanding The Range Of Narcissistic Self-Image

Grandiose narcissists have an inflated sense of self-worth, frequently boasting about achievements and demanding special treatment. Contrastingly, vulnerable narcissists can be very shy and self-hating, as they often have co-occurring social anxiety and depression, but they still behave in unacceptably callous ways. If your partner isn’t overly arrogant in public but still lacks empathy, is vindictive and envious, is highly critical of other people, and makes everything about themselves, they might have NPD.

Shifting Blame To Avoid Taking Responsibility

Narcissists often deflect blame, refusing to acknowledge their mistakes or accept criticism. They rarely apologize for mistreating people, and when they do, it’s rarely genuine. A spouse with NPD may even criticize or gaslight you by blatantly denying that they said or did something hurtful, causing you to feel ashamed and to doubt your own memories.

Set Boundaries & Maintain Your Own Mental Health

The decision to stay or leave a relationship with a narcissistic partner is deeply personal and dependent on individual circumstances. If you choose to stay, it’s essential to prioritize your well-being, establish healthy boundaries, seek support, and actively engage in therapy. That being said, if you’re in an abusive relationship, it’s essential to formulate an escape plan because the situation is unlikely to change and could even escalate to dangerous levels.

  • Establish and maintain clear boundaries to protect your emotional well-being, and consistently follow through with enforcing them.
  • Communicate your needs assertively and calmly to avoid triggering shame, which can encourage a narcissist to “double down” on their self-absorbed ways.
  • Reach out to trusted friends, family, or support groups to share your experiences and gain perspective and support.
  • Consider individual therapy for yourself to explore your emotions, learn coping strategies, and develop a deeper understanding of the dynamics at play.
  • Suggest couples therapy as a means of addressing issues within the relationship.
  • Encourage your partner to pursue therapy specifically tailored for people with Cluster B disorders, such as schema therapy.
  • Recommend a personality disorder specialist who can help them address underlying self-esteem issues and promote self-reflection and growth.

Seek Professional Guidance & Support

Living with a narcissistic spouse or partner can be emotionally challenging, but understanding the dynamics and taking proactive steps can help you navigate the situation more effectively. A skilled therapist can help facilitate healthy communication, promote empathy, and resolve conflicts, but only if your spouse has some level of willingness to genuinely reflect on their own actions—you can’t force someone to change. For individual or couples therapy in Southern California, book an appointment with Dr. Taji Huang today.

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How Does Disordered Attachment Affect Mental Health? https://www.drtaji.com/disordered-attachment-affect-mental-health/ Wed, 24 May 2023 21:44:18 +0000 https://www.drtaji.com/?p=1275 Severe childhood trauma, such as abuse and neglect, can cause a disorganized or “fearful-avoidant” style of attachment. This style combines elements of the avoidant style with those displayed in the anxious-preoccupied style creating a sort of push-pull dynamic with your partner. That being said, attachment styles are dynamic and subject to change throughout your life, […]

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Severe childhood trauma, such as abuse and neglect, can cause a disorganized or “fearful-avoidant” style of attachment. This style combines elements of the avoidant style with those displayed in the anxious-preoccupied style creating a sort of push-pull dynamic with your partner. That being said, attachment styles are dynamic and subject to change throughout your life, so you can absolutely develop a healthier one through therapy, introspection, communication skills, and self-care.

Understand The Roots Of Disorganized Attachment

Attachment theory states that our early childhood experiences and relationships with our primary caregivers set the stage for how we form and maintain relationships throughout our adult lives. Disorganized attachment is typically characterized by a desire for intimacy when you don’t have it and then pulling away in fear or mistrust when you do achieve it.

  • Difficulty Finding & “Keeping” A Partner
  • An Intense Yearning For—But Also A Fear Of—Closeness
  • Frequent Relationship Conflicts
  • Chronic Loneliness
  • Severe Social Anxiety
  • Difficulty Trusting Others

Healthier Attachments For A Healthier You

Your attachment style can affect your ease of forming fulfilling and lasting relationships, which can impact your health both physically and mentally. Disorganized attachment doesn’t just make romantic partnerships difficult, it can also negatively affect how you interact with your friends and even your family.

Relationship Issues Affect Your Physical & Mental Health

Humans are a fundamentally social species, so fulfilling relationships—whether romantic, familial, or platonic in nature—are a basic survival need that can actually influence your overall health. As we grow older, chronic loneliness and relationship instability increase the risk of everything from depression and cognitive decline and can cause mortality from things like heart attacks and strokes.

People with secure attachment styles may find it easier to meet new people and resolve conflicts, whereas insecure or contradictory styles often give way to stressful arguments, distrust, and interpersonal turmoil.

Therapy Creates A Foundation For Healing

People with disorganized attachment can learn to create rewarding relationships, but it is difficult without help. Trust is the first step, and it is often easier to trust a psychologist and the safe space that they cultivate at the beginning of your journey. A therapist can work with you on developing healthy coping and communication skills that bolster your ability to create fulfilling relationships.

Take Your First Step Towards Well-Being

As our models of well-being become increasingly interconnected between mental, physical, and emotional health, it’s clear that healing from trauma and creating healthy interpersonal bonds are essential for your overall health. Dr. Taji Huang is a renowned clinical psychologist and relationship therapist who has helped people from all walks of life, including celebrities, heal from attachment disorders. Contact her Glendale office today and book your first appointment.

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Why We Push People Away: Avoidant Attachment in Adults https://www.drtaji.com/avoidant-attachment-in-adults/ Mon, 24 Apr 2023 01:34:32 +0000 https://www.drtaji.com/?p=1259 Attachment styles are patterns of relating to people that we develop as children and that shape our adult relationships. Avoidant attachment is an insecure type that can make it harder to form and maintain close relationships. If you have this particular style, you might find it hard to find a date, have “commitment issues,” or […]

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Attachment styles are patterns of relating to people that we develop as children and that shape our adult relationships. Avoidant attachment is an insecure type that can make it harder to form and maintain close relationships. If you have this particular style, you might find it hard to find a date, have “commitment issues,” or often find that your partner is often mad at you, but the good news is that there are steps you can take to change your attachment type and live a happier life.

Recognize Your Avoidant Tendencies

The first step is to recognize your attachment type and the tendencies that come with it. People with an avoidant style often feel very uncomfortable with emotional intimacy, preferring to keep others at a distance. If this sounds like you, try to be mindful of these patterns when interacting with others.

  • Afraid of long-term commitments because they make you feel “trapped” or uncomfortable.
  • You “clam up” when your partner or friends become emotional.
  • Get annoyed or cranky whenever your partner complains about problems in their life.
  • Feel powerless when loved ones are upset, so you immediately try to jump in and “fix” things instead of simply listening.
  • Don’t understand why people can’t keep their emotional struggles to themselves.
  • Think others will judge or reject you for showing vulnerability or “weakness.”
  • Tend to withdraw during times of stress or hardship because you feel uncomfortable seeking support from others.
  • Become very defensive or retreat at the first sign of conflict.
  • Afraid of losing your sense of self in a relationship.

It’s Possible To Change Your Attachment Style

People generally feel better when they have connections with others. Having an avoidant attachment can make it difficult to have an adult relationship with another person that meets your needs. It’s important to understand that you can change your attachment style and form those connections through therapy, self-reflection, and work.

  • Recognize Your Avoidant Tendencies
  • Explore The Underlying Feeling
  • Practice Being Vulnerable
  • Be An Active Listener
  • Break Free From Habitual Responses

Therapy Leads You To The Right Path

Talking to a psychologist can help you recognize when your attachment style is affecting your ability to form positive connections. Through therapy, you can explore and understand the root causes of your avoidance, learn effective communication, and work on building secure attachment styles through exercises and feedback from your therapist. Couples therapy with your partner can also help build the trust and communication necessary for a healthy relationship.

Explore The Underlying Feeling

Notice when you start to feel uncomfortable and try to identify what’s triggering those feelings. Were your needs often ignored or dismissed as a child, so you don’t feel comfortable relying on your partner for support? Did your parents punish you for crying or being fearful, so you think your spouse should just “suck it up” whenever they’re upset? It’s possible that your early life experiences are influencing your current view of emotions in a relationship. However, partners in a healthy relationship don’t ignore or reject each other for showing their vulnerable sides.

Practice Being Vulnerable

It’s easy to fall into the habit of pushing people away when you’re upset or struggling, but doing so only reinforces your attachment style and keeps you from finding deeper fulfillment. Instead, try to take small steps toward building more meaningful connections. Share your thoughts and feelings with someone you trust, even if it initially triggers your fear of rejection or judgment—a good friend or partner will genuinely want to be there for you in your most vulnerable moments.

Be An Active Listener

If you can’t seem to keep a date for very long or often find yourself in the proverbial “dog house” with your spouse, it’s possible your attachment style is affecting your communication skills. Since avoidant folks are often uncomfortable talking about their own emotions, they may not be comfortable hearing about other people’s feelings either. When your partner opens up to you, try practicing active listening and validating their feelings rather than withdrawing from the conversation or immediately jumping in to offer solutions.

Break Free From Habitual Responses

Avoidant attachment can cause people to react in certain ways when they feel threatened, such as withdrawing or becoming defensive whenever someone voices a concern. Instead of giving in to these automatic responses, try to pause and reflect on what’s happening at the moment. By taking a few deep breaths first, you can respond in a more intentional and vulnerable way.

Get The Support You Need To Embrace Change

Improving your attachment style won’t happen overnight. If you find yourself struggling with emotional intimacy, reach out to Dr. Taji Huang in the Glendale, CA area today to start building more robust and fulfilling relationships. With support and practice, you can build more positive connections with other people and have your emotional needs fulfilled.

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Ambivalent Attachment https://www.drtaji.com/ambivalent-attachment/ Thu, 23 Mar 2023 17:33:37 +0000 https://www.drtaji.com/?p=1252 Ambivalent attachment, also known as anxious preoccupied or anxious ambivalent attachment, is one of the four main patterns of relating to people identified in attachment theory. This theory suggests that how we relate to our primary caregivers in childhood influences how we form and maintain relationships throughout our lives. Understand The Roots Of Ambivalent Attachment […]

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Ambivalent attachment, also known as anxious preoccupied or anxious ambivalent attachment, is one of the four main patterns of relating to people identified in attachment theory. This theory suggests that how we relate to our primary caregivers in childhood influences how we form and maintain relationships throughout our lives.

Understand The Roots Of Ambivalent Attachment

Individuals with ambivalent styles typically had caregivers who were inconsistently available or responsive during their childhood. As a result, they craved the attention they were not regularly receiving and became clingy in an effort to get it. It is important to note that the anxious ambivalent attachment style is not a diagnosis but a pattern of behavior that can be modified through conscious effort.

Desiring Intimacy & Fearing Abandonment

One of the hallmarks of this style is a strong desire for intimacy combined with a fear of abandonment. This can create a push-pull dynamic in relationships where someone may pursue their partner too aggressively, which can often overwhelm them and cause their partner to withdraw. This can feel like rejection to the ambivalently attached person.

Recognizing Ambivalent Attachment In Adulthood

An ambivalent person wants proof of love and affection but often has difficulty believing their partner’s emotional displays and words. They nearly always feel that their relationship is in jeopardy, and they feel and act on that accordingly.

  • Intense Fear Of Being Neglected, Cheated On, Or Abandoned
  • Feeling Insecure Despite Constantly Seeking Reassurance
  • Overwhelming Your Partner With Over-Dependency
  • Picking Fights For Spending Less Time Together
  • Struggling With Jealousy, Possessiveness, or Control Issues

This Impacts Your Relationship’s Health

Individuals with ambivalent attachment styles can sometimes feel compelled to pick fights for not spending enough time together due to feeling undervalued. They may interpret ambiguous cues from their partners as wholly negative. For example, if their partner doesn’t respond immediately to a text, they may assume their partner is angry, and become defensive.

Moving Towards Healthy Attachment

Despite the challenges associated with anxious-preoccupied attachment, you can learn to form healthier relationships through therapy and self-reflection. Cognitive-behavioral therapy, couples counseling, and attachment-focused therapy can help challenge negative thought patterns and develop positive coping strategies. This can build the trust and communication necessary for a healthy relationship in a safe environment.

Modifying Your Habits At Home

Not all change happens in a therapist’s office—it’s possible to work on attachment issues by increasing your sense of self-worth. You can start by building a strong support network, engaging in enjoyable hobbies and self-care, and developing purpose outside your relationship.

Improve Your Attachment Style With Relationship Therapy

If you suspect you may have an ambivalent attachment style, seeking the help of a professional can be an important first step toward a more secure relationship. Contact clinical psychologist Dr. Taji Huang today for individual or couples therapy in the Glendale area. With the right tools and support, you can learn to form meaningful connections while keeping a sense of self-worth and independence.

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Secure Attachments In Adult Relationships https://www.drtaji.com/secure-attachments-in-relationships/ Mon, 20 Feb 2023 02:19:54 +0000 https://www.drtaji.com/?p=1237 Secure attachment is a crucial component in healthy adult relationships characterized by trust, empathy, and mutual respect. In contrast, insecure attachment styles can lead to many negative consequences in relationships. Despite being rooted in early childhood experiences and trauma from past relationships, these styles are responsive to change with the right tools and effort. An […]

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Secure attachment is a crucial component in healthy adult relationships characterized by trust, empathy, and mutual respect. In contrast, insecure attachment styles can lead to many negative consequences in relationships. Despite being rooted in early childhood experiences and trauma from past relationships, these styles are responsive to change with the right tools and effort. An experienced couples counselor like Dr. Taji Huang can help with that.

Trust & Self-Esteem Helps Relationships

People usually develop a secure attachment style as a result of a childhood where they felt comforted and protected by their caregiver but also free to explore relationships and their environment. This experience lets you, as an adult, have an easier time developing close emotional bonds and the ability to soothe your own emotions. It helps you have a healthy and fulfilling relationship by giving you the tools to feel comfortable with emotional intimacy.

  • A Stable & Positive View Of Your Partner
  • An Innate Sense Of Self-Esteem
  • Ability To Handle Conflicts In A Healthy & Constructive Way
  • Less Jealousy
  • An Easier Time Committing To & Being Vulnerable Around Your Partner
  • A Deep & Lasting Sense Of Trust

Insecure Attachment Makes It Difficult To Relate

People with insecure attachment styles have difficulty relating to others due to a deep sense of insecurity, difficulty communicating, and difficulty understanding others’ emotions and their own. This difficulty relating to others can make someone unable to handle conflicts well, and can also manifest in several different ways.

  • Jealousy, Possessiveness & Lack Of Trust
  • Idealizing Or Devaluing Your Partner
  • Fear Of Abandonment, Judgment, Or Engulfment
  • Constant Need For Reassurance
  • Emotional Instability & Unpredictability
  • Discomfort Regarding Vulnerability & Commitment
  • An Exaggerated Need For Control
  • Inability To Self-Soothe & Manage Stress

Give Yourself The Tools For A Secure Relationship

It’s possible to develop a secure attachment style through various techniques. By working through each other’s insecurities together with your partner, you can foster a secure and trusting relationship. It does take time, dedication, and an open mind, but you and your partner can overcome any obstacles to your happiness and create the secure and fulfilling partnership you both dream of.

  • Practice mindfulness and self-compassion.
  • Learn to express your feelings and needs in healthy ways rather than via denial, passive-aggression, stonewalling, or hurtful language.
  • Use compassion, empathy, and gentle language when communicating with your partner.
  • Keep an open mind when listening to each other’s concerns.
  • Cultivate trust by being honest, nonjudgmental, and consistent.
  • Mutually set and respect each other’s boundaries.
  • Seek professional help when needed.

A Therapist Can Help You On The Path

Couples counseling is an effective way to address the issues that arise from unresolved attachment issues. A good counselor or marriage therapist can provide you with the tools and strategies necessary to create and maintain strong connections characterized by trust, compassion, and security. With the right tools, you can work together to create a secure attachment and ensure that your relationship is healthy, supportive, and lasting.

Couples Counseling Is The First Step

Couples counseling may be the answer if you and your partner are struggling with insecurity, communication issues, or distrust in your relationship. Contact Dr. Taji Huang’s Glendale, California office today to schedule your first appointment. She is a licensed clinical psychologist who helps partners understand and overcome the challenges of insecure attachment so that they can establish healthier ways of relating to one another.

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What Are Attachment Styles? https://www.drtaji.com/what-are-attachment-styles/ Wed, 25 Jan 2023 22:36:05 +0000 https://www.drtaji.com/?p=1220 If you and your partner struggle to understand each other’s feelings and keep rehashing the same arguments over and over, mismatching attachment styles might be to blame. This becomes especially apparent in romantic partnerships, in which emotional intimacy is key. The 4 Main Attachment Styles Attachment theory states that how your primary caregivers interacted with you as a child directly […]

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If you and your partner struggle to understand each other’s feelings and keep rehashing the same arguments over and over, mismatching attachment styles might be to blame. This becomes especially apparent in romantic partnerships, in which emotional intimacy is key.

The 4 Main Attachment Styles

Attachment theory states that how your primary caregivers interacted with you as a child directly affects your way of relating to others as an adult.

  • Anxious-Preoccupied
  • Dismissive-Avoidant
  • Fearful-Avoidant Or “Disorganized”
  • Secure

Anxious-Preoccupied Attachment

People with the anxious attachment type tend to fear abandonment or being neglected. These people idealize their partner and expect the same in return, as they fear abandonment or perceive a lack of closeness in the relationship. They may get angry at their partner and pick fights if they aren’t getting their emotional needs met.

Dismissive-Avoidant Attachment

People with an avoidant attachment style distance themselves from their partners, putting up emotional walls and rigid boundaries to avoid allowing anyone too close. These individuals pride themselves on self-sufficiency, and they avoid appearing vulnerable for fear of rejection or losing their sense of self in the relationship.

Fearful-Avoidant Attachment

The fearful-avoidant, or “disorganized”, type combines the fear of neglect or abandonment of the anxious type with the avoidant type’s fear of losing themselves or rejection. This attachment style is the most difficult to treat without professional help.

Secure Attachment

People with a secure attachment style can express their emotions and needs plainly to their partners. They can also handle rejection or criticism without bristling up. This style is usually associated with healthier relationships, though childhood trauma can make it difficult for people to develop this style while growing up.

Where Did Your Attachment Style Come From?

People with anxious attachment styles received inconsistent care and emotional comfort from caregivers as a child. Avoidants might come from a family that criticized them for crying or showing vulnerability, which is why they grow up to be adults who have difficulty with emotional conflict. A disorganized attachment comes from a child learning that caregivers might inconsistently abandon them as well as punish them for expressing basic needs.

Mismatching Styles Can Create Conflict

When it comes to attachment theory, the saying that “opposites attract” may have some truth to it. Anxious types and avoidant types tend to be drawn toward each other. In such relationships, the anxious partner may interpret their partner as being callous, aloof, self-absorbed, or uncaring, while the avoidant partner might view the anxious partner as clingy, manipulative, hypersensitive, or unstable. This creates a vicious cycle that hurts both partners.

Breaking The Anxious Vs. Avoidant Conflict Cycle

Most avoidant people don’t harbor genuine malice or ill will towards their partner. They have deep-seated emotional trauma from childhood that led them to unconsciously develop thick emotional barriers. Likewise, most anxiously attached people are not trying to reject or manipulate their partner with their emotional displays. They simply fear that their partner will not be there to meet their needs unless they show their feelings in plain sight.

Can You Change Your Attachment Type?

The answer to this question is a resounding “yes!” Like many maladaptive thinking patterns, people with insecure attachment styles are able to change with enough practice, open-mindedness, and the right tools. Therapy exercises, a growth mindset, and daily mindfulness practices can rewire your brain and change how you relate to your partner.

Relationship Counseling Can Help

One of the goals of marriage counseling is to reach a point where both parties are secure enough to meet each other’s needs. The avoidant can learn to fulfill their partner’s need for increased communication, time spent together, and emotional intimacy, and the anxious person can learn to give the avoidant partner enough space, privacy, and alone time. The key is developing a better understanding of each other and yourselves.

Couples’ Therapy In Southern California

Dr. Taji Huang is a professional psychologist and relationship counselor based in Glendale, CA. She can help you and your partner empathize with each other’s differences and move towards developing secure attachment styles. Contact her office today to schedule a couples’ therapy appointment.

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7 New Year’s Resolutions For Couples https://www.drtaji.com/new-years-resolutions-for-couples/ Wed, 14 Dec 2022 23:07:56 +0000 https://www.drtaji.com/?p=1200 New Year’s is a great time to reflect on the past and set goals for the future. As couples, it can be especially beneficial to take some time to think about your relationship and make resolutions that will help you grow and strengthen your bond. Whether you’re looking for ways to improve communication, rekindle the […]

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New Year’s is a great time to reflect on the past and set goals for the future. As couples, it can be especially beneficial to take some time to think about your relationship and make resolutions that will help you grow and strengthen your bond. Whether you’re looking for ways to improve communication, rekindle the “spark” you once had, or tackle more challenging issues, here are a few New Year’s resolutions for couples to consider.

7 Relationship Goals For The New Year

  1. Spend More Quality Time Together
  2. Talk More
  3. Fight Clean
  4. Be More Forgiving
  5. Show Appreciation For Each Other
  6. Be Intimate Often
  7. Consider Couples’ Counseling

1. Make Quality Time Together a Priority

Any long-term partnership can potentially lead to feelings of boredom or “being in a rut,” so it’s essential to put in the effort to try new things together. Consider taking turns planning weekly dates or outings to reaffirm the feelings you once had when you first started dating. These date nights don’t have to be extravagant or expensive. The key is to show each other that you’re still putting in the time and effort to make each other happy.

2. Engage In More Conversations

Communication is key in any relationship, and it’s often the cause of many problems. Whether you have disagreements or want to hear more about each other’s days, open and honest communication is essential for maintaining a lasting partnership. Try setting aside some time every week to sit down and talk with one another without any distractions like cell phones or the TV.

3. Fight Clean

Arguments are a normal part of any relationship, but it’s important not to let minor disagreements fester or turn into larger issues. Try developing some simple ground rules for handling conflict, such as never speaking harshly or shouting, refraining from criticism, and always focusing on the issue at hand. Additionally, make a conscious effort to listen and empathize with the emotions behind each others’ words. This will help ensure that everyone feels heard and understood, no matter the topic of the argument.

4. Try To Be More Forgiving

Everyone makes mistakes, so try your best to let go of the little things instead of holding grudges against each other. Instead of allowing resentment to build over time, focus on taking a deep breath, respectfully communicating your feelings to your partner, and trying to see things from their perspective. You should also avoid bringing up past transgressions during unrelated arguments, as this can negatively affect your relationship.

5. Be Appreciative Of Each Other

Say “thank you” and “I love you” often, and express your appreciation for how your partner supports and loves you. Even if you feel that these sentiments are trivial or obvious, showing your partner that they play a key role in your life is crucial. This can be as simple as sending a text message during the day, leaving little notes for each other, making a small romantic gesture at the end of the week, or any other idea that aligns with each other’s love languages.

6. Be Intimate Often

Physical affection is essential for any intimate partnership, as most couples consider it to be one of the key factors that distinguish a romantic bond from a platonic friendship. You and your partner should engage in whatever forms of intimacy work for you, whether that includes cuddling, kissing, hand-holding, or more risqué forms of physical intimacy.

7. Take Advantage Of Couples Counseling

If you feel like your relationship is struggling and are unsure how to address the issues, consider seeking professional help. A therapist can also help you safely and productively work through any lingering feelings of frustration or resentment without jeopardizing your relationship. Ultimately, couples therapy aims to help you build a stronger and more fulfilling partnership that lasts well into the future.

Marriage Counseling In Southern California

Dr. Taji Huang is an experienced clinical psychologist and relationship therapist based in Glendale. She can offer support, guidance, and strategies for dealing with common problems many couples face throughout their partnership. Contact her office today to schedule your first session.

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9 Social Phobias & What You Can Do About Them https://www.drtaji.com/social-phobias-what-you-can-do-about-them/ Sun, 27 Nov 2022 05:29:43 +0000 https://www.drtaji.com/?p=1195 Social phobia, also known as social anxiety disorder, is a fear of being judged and evaluated negatively when interacting with other people. It can manifest as specific fears, such as fear of public speaking or eating in front of others, or as an overall feeling of discomfort. What Does Social Anxiety Look Like? Social anxiety […]

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Social phobia, also known as social anxiety disorder, is a fear of being judged and evaluated negatively when interacting with other people. It can manifest as specific fears, such as fear of public speaking or eating in front of others, or as an overall feeling of discomfort.

What Does Social Anxiety Look Like?

Social anxiety exists on a spectrum—ranging from feeling nervous introducing yourself to strangers, to struggling to complete tasks while being observed, to not being able to leave the house. As a result, you may avoid meaningful events and interactions, which can negatively impact your interpersonal relationships, career prospects, and overall happiness.

Anxious About Being Anxious

Some people with social phobia may also experience a type of “meta anxiety,” wherein they worry that other people might be able to tell when they’re anxious (although it’s rarely as noticeable to observers).

9 Common Social Phobia Manifestations

  1. Meeting New People
  2. Conversing With Strangers
  3. Interacting With Authority Figures
  4. Making Phone Calls
  5. Public Speaking
  6. Speaking In Groups
  7. Eating, Drinking, & Using The Restroom In Public
  8. Going To Work
  9. Leaving The House

Overcoming Social Anxiety

Fortunately, there are a few steps you can take to manage your anxiety so that you can live the best possible life. Cognitive behavioral therapy is a well-researched and effective treatment for social phobia. Moreover, an experienced therapist or counselor can help you learn new coping strategies, grounding techniques, and ways of challenging your core fears.

When Is It Time To See A Therapist For Social Phobia?

It’s important to seek therapy when social anxiety begins to interfere with your quality of life and your relationships. Even if you feel like you’re able to manage, you should still get help if the anxiety is causing you to suffer—you deserve to not only survive but thrive. Talking to a professional can provide tools and support for overcoming your phobias and leading a more fulfilling life.

Anxiety Counseling In Southern California

If your anxiety is preventing you from having fulfilling relationships, jobs, and experiences, consider reaching out for professional support. Dr. Taji Huang is a licensed psychologist and anxiety therapist in Glendale, CA, who can help you address and overcome your social phobias. Don’t let fear hold you back from living the life you dream of– take that first brave step of seeking help today.

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7 Signs It’s Time to See a Therapist https://www.drtaji.com/signs-its-time-to-see-a-therapist/ Sun, 23 Oct 2022 22:30:51 +0000 https://www.drtaji.com/?p=1185 Many people think of therapy as a last resort to turn to in only the direst of mental health crises. However, this simply isn’t the case, as therapy can benefit anybody at any time. There are so many good reasons to seek out professional support—and it’s time for our society to abandon the stigma surrounding […]

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Many people think of therapy as a last resort to turn to in only the direst of mental health crises. However, this simply isn’t the case, as therapy can benefit anybody at any time. There are so many good reasons to seek out professional support—and it’s time for our society to abandon the stigma surrounding mental health topics.

7 Signs It’s Time to See a Therapist

  1. You feel like you’re constantly struggling and don’t know how to cope.
  2. Negative thoughts are taking over your life, and you can’t seem to shake them.
  3. You feel isolated, disconnected, or lonely even when you’re around other people.
  4. You constantly feel “on edge,” or your mood seems to shift rapidly without warning.
  5. You rely on unhealthy coping mechanisms, such as drugs or alcohol, to cope with difficult emotions.
  6. You’re almost always tired, even after a full night’s rest.
  7. You feel numb, empty, or like you’re just “going through the motions” in life.

Your Life Feels Like A Constant Struggle

If you’re struggling with anxiety, stress, and burnout, you might feel like you barely have the time and energy to get through each day, let alone enjoy your life. However, it’s important to give yourself enough time to rest, rejuvenate, and live a more balanced life—even if the mainstream “hustle culture” suggests otherwise. Taking even a few minutes each day to relax and recharge can make a big difference in how you feel, and, if that doesn’t work, a therapist can help you learn new techniques to set boundaries and prevent burnout.

Negative Thoughts Are Taking Over

It’s natural for everyone to have some negative thoughts from time to time, but if they become persistent and start affecting your daily life, it might be a sign that you’re depressed. A therapist trained in CBT or Cognitive Behavioral Therapy can work with you to identify unconscious patterns in your thinking so that you challenge these negative thoughts and rewrite them into a self-affirming narrative. It may take a while before the positive thoughts become automatic, but CBT can definitely help you break free from negative thinking patterns and improve your mood in the long run.

You Feel Lonely & Isolated

It’s common for people struggling with depression or social anxiety to feel isolated or disconnected, even if they’re constantly around other people. Therapy provides a safe, non-judgmental space for you to explore the reasons behind these feelings and address any underlying issues that may be contributing to them. It’s also a great place to learn new communication strategies for building healthier and happier relationships with family, friends, and romantic partners.

You Feel “On Edge” & Have Frequent Mood Swings

Chronic stress, mood disorders, and a history of trauma can all cause mood instability or irritability that seems to show up out of the blue. Therapy can help you identify the triggers for these feelings so that you can manage them. This may include finding healthy emotional outlets, practicing relaxation techniques, adjusting your thinking patterns, setting better boundaries, and healing your trauma.

You Rely On Unhealthy Coping Methods

It’s common for people to turn to alcohol, drugs, shopping, sex, gambling, video gaming, or workaholism to drown out negative emotions, but these addictive behaviors will likely cause further harm in the long run. A therapist can help you explore the reasons behind your reliance on unhealthy coping mechanisms and find healthier ways to manage difficult emotions.

You Feel Numb & Empty

The human mind has a unique ability to shut off its own emotions in order to cope with unbearable stress, anxiety, trauma, or grief. While dissociation helps protect you from pain long enough to survive in the short term, it can also shut out feelings of joy, love, and existential fulfillment, and this can make you feel like life is meaningless. A good therapist can help you slowly uncover, process, and release your trauma or grief in a healthy and cathartic way that will ultimately lead to healing, peace, and a sense of purpose.

You’re Struggling With A Life Transition

Transitional periods can be difficult to navigate since they often cause uncertainty and grief, which are natural responses to change and loss. Please note that this isn’t exclusive to the death of a loved one—it can be triggered by any major life event. A therapist can provide a safe space for you to process and understand your feelings, as well as offer coping skills and support during this challenging time.

Difficult Transitions A Therapist Can Help With

  • Losing A Pet
  • Having A Miscarriage
  • Coping With A Breakup
  • Starting A New Job
  • Getting Divorced
  • Moving To A New Home
  • Becoming A Parent
  • Enrolling Your Child In Preschool Or Kindergarten
  • Having “Empty Nest Syndrome” When Your Child Leaves For College

Professional Counseling In Glendale

If any of these seven signs stood out as relevant to you, consider reaching out to a Glendale therapist for support. Dr. Taji Huang is an experienced psychologist who can help with anxiety, depression, OCD, PTSD, life transitions, and grief counseling. Contact her office today to schedule your first appointment.

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What Is Depersonalization-Derealization? https://www.drtaji.com/what-is-depersonalization-derealization/ Thu, 23 Jun 2022 21:13:21 +0000 https://www.drtaji.com/?p=1142 If you feel deeply disconnected from your mind, body, feelings, memories, or the world around you, you may be experiencing common symptoms of a condition called depersonalization-derealization disorder (DPDR). The symptoms of DPDR are very real and debilitating, making it difficult for people with the condition to cope with everyday life. However, it is treatable, […]

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If you feel deeply disconnected from your mind, body, feelings, memories, or the world around you, you may be experiencing common symptoms of a condition called depersonalization-derealization disorder (DPDR). The symptoms of DPDR are very real and debilitating, making it difficult for people with the condition to cope with everyday life. However, it is treatable, and an experienced trauma and anxiety therapist such as Dr. Taji Huang, PhD in Glendale, CA can help you identify ways to feel safe, normal, and grounded in your daily life.

What Is DPDR?

DPDR is a type of dissociative disorder, which means that it causes people to have a sense of disconnection from their bodies and the world around them. People with DPDR may feel like they are outside of their bodies, or like their thoughts, emotions, physical sensations, or memories don’t quite belong to them. They may also feel like the world around them is not real, or like they are in a dream. These dissociative symptoms can be very distressing and make it difficult to function in day-to-day life.

Symptoms Of DPDR

The symptoms of DPDR can vary from person to person, especially since some people with the condition only experience depersonalization or derealization rather than both. As such, everyone’s experience is different, but there are some common symptoms.

Depersonalization Symptoms

  • You feel out of touch with your own body.
  • You feel detached from your emotions and memories, almost as if they aren’t really yours.
  • When you say or do something, it feels like you’re a robot “going through the motions” in life.
  • It feels like you’re a passive observer (rather than the action-taker) in your body.
  • When you dissociate, it feels as if your head is wrapped in cotton.
  • Sometimes, you feel little to no physical pain, even when you are injured.
  • There are times when you look in the mirror and don’t recognize yourself.
  • You don’t have a sense of identity.
  • At times, it feels like you aren’t a real person or don’t really exist.

Derealization Symptoms

  • When you get anxious or stressed, the world can start to feel and look very different.
  • Sometimes, it feels like reality isn’t real or that the world as we know it might not really exist.
  • Sometimes, your color or depth perception feels different than usual.
  • When you dissociate, it feels like you’re looking at the world behind a pane of glass or a veil of fog.
  • The world around you sometimes looks dull, muted, and “not real enough.”
  • Conversely, things might look uncanny, cartoonish, or “too vivid to be real.”
  • It feels like life is a dream or a movie rather than reality.
  • During a dissociative episode, your sense of time is distorted.

Coping With Dissociation

These dissociative symptoms can be extremely distressing and make it difficult to function in your daily life. However, there is hope. Some people with DPDR find it helpful to use sensory-based techniques to ground themselves and feel more connected to their bodies and the world. Some options include:

  • Using An Ice Pack On Your Face
  • Doing Cardio Or Yoga
  • Taking A Cold Shower
  • Eating Peppermint, Cinnamon, Or Sour Candy
  • Mindfully Consuming Some Ice Cream, Ice, Or A Popsicle
  • Using Perfumes, Essential Oils, Or Smelling Salts

Therapy Can Help

If you are experiencing any symptoms of DPDR, it is important to talk to a therapist who is well-versed in treating the root causes of dissociation, since depersonalization and derealization often (but don’t always) stem from trauma or severe anxiety. She can also help you learn specific grounding techniques and ways of coping during a dissociative episode in order to reduce their frequency, intensity, and duration.

Depersonalization-Derealization Disorder Treatment In Glendale, CA

Dr. Taji Huang PhD, based in Glendale, California has years of experience working with clients suffering from dissociative disorders and other anxiety- or trauma-based conditions. She also offers services in the surrounding areas of Los Feliz, Eagle Rock, Silverlake, Burbank, Pasadena, and Los Angeles. If you or someone you know is struggling with DPDR, please don’t hesitate to reach out for help. Contact her office today to schedule an appointment.

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How To Help Someone Having A Panic Attack https://www.drtaji.com/helping-a-panic-attack/ Wed, 23 Mar 2022 17:06:18 +0000 https://www.drtaji.com/?p=1118 Panic attacks can happen to anyone, but they’re an especially common occurrence for those suffering from anxiety or panic disorder. It can be difficult to watch someone you care about have a panic attack, especially if you don’t know what they’re experiencing, so it’s important to learn how to help them. If your loved one lives […]

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Panic attacks can happen to anyone, but they’re an especially common occurrence for those suffering from anxiety or panic disorder. It can be difficult to watch someone you care about have a panic attack, especially if you don’t know what they’re experiencing, so it’s important to learn how to help them. If your loved one lives near Glendale, CA, Dr. Taji Huang can help.

What Causes Panic Attacks?

Many mental health conditions can cause panic attacks, although they can happen to anyone even if they haven’t been diagnosed with an anxiety disorder. However, the most common conditions associated with panic attacks include panic disorder, generalized anxiety disorder, social anxiety, agoraphobia, post-traumatic stress disorder, obsessive-compulsive disorder, and phobias.

Symptoms Of A Panic Attack

If you haven’t had a full-blown panic attack before, it can be difficult to understand what your friend or loved one is going through. You might be really worried and confused to see them suddenly start to tremble, hyperventilate, cry, freeze up, or lose the ability to speak. Panic attacks can vary greatly depending on the individual, so not everyone has the same symptoms, but here are some of the unpleasant things your loved one might be experiencing during an attack:

  • Rapid Heart Rate
  • Hyperventilation
  • Shortness of Breath
  • Heart Palpitations
  • Severe Anxiety, Dread, Or Terror
  • Nausea
  • Stomach Discomfort
  • Dizziness
  • Headaches
  • Feeling Lightheaded
  • Muscle Tension & Limb Cramps
  • Temporary Limb Paralysis
  • Numbness & Tingling Sensations
  • Chills
  • Hot Flashes
  • Trembling & Shaking
  • Chest Pain Or Tightness
  • Throat Tightness
  • Feeling Like They’re Suffocating Or Choking
  • Feeling “Cut Off” From Reality
  • Feeling Like Reality Isn’t Real
  • Feeling Detached From Their Own Body
  • Fear Of Losing Control, “Going Crazy,” Or “Losing Their Mind”
  • A Sense Of Impending Doom
  • Fearing That They Are About To Die

What Can You Do To Help?

It’s important that you talk with the person who experiences panic attacks in order to learn what to do if you see them having a panic attack. For example, some people may find it reassuring or comforting to have a loved one hold their hand, say soothing words, or gently touch them when they start to panic, whereas for others (such as some people with PTSD), the same well-meaning actions could remind them of their trauma and make the anxiety attack worse. Everyone is different, so it’s best to ask your friend or family member in advance how they prefer to be supported.

Specific Ways Of Supporting Someone During A Panic Attack

  • Talk in a soothing, compassionate, and gentle voice.
  • Remind them that you’re here for them and that you care.
  • Ask them if they’d like to sit down or go to a quieter, less crowded location.
  • Reassure them that the panic attack will only last a few minutes.
  • Ask them if they’d like a gentle hug or to hold hands, but never touch them without explicit permission.
  • Avoid appearing overly anxious or upset, as this can make their anxiety attack worse.
  • Never tell them to “calm down” or that they’re “overreacting.”
  • Give them space if they ask for it, but remind them that you’ll come back if they change their mind.

Anxiety Therapist In Glendale

Dr. Taji Huang is a licensed psychologist with extensive experience treating anxiety disorders using effective techniques like CBT, EMDR, and exposure therapy. Contact her office today for more information on how she can help.

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7 Tips For Managing Work Anxiety https://www.drtaji.com/7-tips-for-managing-work-anxiety/ Wed, 23 Feb 2022 20:34:29 +0000 https://www.drtaji.com/?p=1114 Coping with work-related anxiety and stress can be extremely challenging, from learning how to tell people “no” to prioritizing what feels like an overwhelming workload. But you don’t have to suffer alone. In Glendale, CA, Dr. Taji Huang, a licensed psychologist and mental health counselor with extensive experience treating anxiety, can help you learn how […]

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Coping with work-related anxiety and stress can be extremely challenging, from learning how to tell people “no” to prioritizing what feels like an overwhelming workload. But you don’t have to suffer alone. In Glendale, CA, Dr. Taji Huang, a licensed psychologist and mental health counselor with extensive experience treating anxiety, can help you learn how to manage workplace stress.

7 Ways To Manage Job Anxiety

  1. Learn your triggers
  2. Practice grounding techniques
  3. Maintain healthy habits & work-life balance
  4. Prioritize your tasks
  5. Organize your workspace
  6. Set boundaries with coworkers
  7. Talk to a therapist

Learn Your Anxiety Triggers

A crucial part of overcoming your work-related anxiety is to identify what triggers it. For some people, the anxiety might stem from having to interact with their boss and coworkers, whereas others might be prone to worrying about looming deadlines. By keeping track of what situations bring up your anxiety, you can develop a plan to reduce or work around it.

Practice Grounding Techniques

Once you’ve identified your triggers, you can practice relaxation techniques, such as deep breathing, mindfulness meditations, and similar coping skills. For instance, if you’re anxious about an upcoming presentation, you could try taking slow, deep breaths with long exhales.

Alternatively, you could use sensory experiences, such as the 5-4-3-2-1 technique, to ground yourself and distract yourself from the anxiety. For example, you could try to identify five things you can see (such as sticky notes on your desk), four things you can touch (such as the feeling of your keyboard), three things you can hear (such as the sound of typing), two things you can smell (such as your coworker’s coffee), and one thing you can taste (such as whatever you ate for lunch).

Maintain Healthy Habits

Physical health affects mental health, so simple habits like getting enough sleep, opting for healthier snacks, getting enough exercise, and limiting your caffeine intake can help reduce your anxiety levels.

Prioritize Your Tasks

Many of us find that it’s easy to procrastinate on dreaded yet important projects by distracting ourselves with more menial tasks, like constantly checking and responding to emails. By creating a to-do list that prioritizes tasks based on how urgent and important they are, you may be able to prevent the anxiety of having to rush to complete major assignments at the last minute.

Organize Your Workspace

A cluttered workspace can contribute to stressful thoughts and anxious feelings. Sometimes, simply tidying up your desk and reorganizing your files can help you feel less stressed and thus less prone to anxiety.

Set Boundaries With Coworkers

Office politics and drama between coworkers can be a significant source of anxiety for everybody, but even more so for people who struggle with generalized anxiety disorder or social anxiety. Unfortunately, we are not always able to control how others treat us, but we can sometimes set healthy boundaries to minimize the negative emotions that come up when coworkers try to dodge their own responsibilities or push us outside our comfort zones.

Learning how to say respectfully and assertively no to unreasonable demands from coworkers can help reduce your overall anxiety and stress levels, especially if you currently have a people-pleasing habit. This can be a really challenging technique to practice at first, so many find it helpful to first practice identifying and setting boundaries in the comfort of a therapist’s office.

Talk To A Therapist

One of the best ways to manage work-related anxiety is to speak with a professional therapist. She can help guide you through the techniques mentioned above and teach you additional strategies tailored to your unique situation.

Work Anxiety Counselor In Southern California

Dr. Taji Huang has over a decade of experience treating anxiety of all different types, and that includes support in coping with workplace anxiety. If you’re struggling to focus at work or feeling overwhelmed, you can learn the skills that will make your day-to-day life better. Contact us today to schedule an appointment.

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A Domestic Violence Survivors Guide To Valentines Day https://www.drtaji.com/a-domestic-violence-survivors-guide-to-valentines-day/ Tue, 25 Jan 2022 17:48:44 +0000 https://www.drtaji.com/?p=1107 Valentine’s Day can be an incredibly challenging time if you’ve been hurt by someone you loved. Don’t let this couple’s holiday catch you off guard. We’ve put together 5 helpful tips to help you on your healing journey. How To Get Through Valentine’s Day As A Domestic Violence Survivor Identify Your Triggers Surround Yourself With […]

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Valentine’s Day can be an incredibly challenging time if you’ve been hurt by someone you loved. Don’t let this couple’s holiday catch you off guard. We’ve put together 5 helpful tips to help you on your healing journey.

How To Get Through Valentine’s Day As A Domestic Violence Survivor

  1. Identify Your Triggers
  2. Surround Yourself With Kind & Loving People
  3. Set Boundaries
  4. Prioritize Your Own Needs
  5. Talk To A Therapist

1. Flowers, Chocolates – Identify Your Triggers

It’s possible that certain situations, objects, scents, sounds, or images might trigger negative emotions and traumatic flashbacks, especially if you developed PTSD or another anxiety disorder as a result of being abused. Identifying and naming your triggers is an important part of processing your trauma.

Anything can potentially be triggering to someone, and your own personal triggers will depend on your traumatic experiences. There’s no need to feel ashamed of being triggered, even if the trigger is something that other people generally associate with positive or happy feelings.

For instance, some domestic violence survivors find that flowers, chocolate, and other Valentine’s Day gifts are triggering because it reminds them of the gifts that their abuser gave them to manipulate them and ask for forgiveness.

2. Surround Yourself With Kind & Loving People

You have a right to heal from your trauma and create a happy and independent life. Part of that process includes surrounding yourself with people who will support you and let you unapologetically be yourself.

It’s okay to limit contact with friends and family members who don’t understand what you’ve been through or who make you feel ashamed, guilty, or fearful. You get to decide how much contact you feel is appropriate.

3. Set Safe Boundaries This February

If you’ve spent a considerable amount of time in an abusive relationship, it’s quite likely that you’ve developed a habit of walking on eggshells and ignoring your own boundaries to appease your abuser. Even if you’re in a safe environment now, your mind and body might still subconsciously struggle to feel safe due to the trauma. As such, you might need to take some time to figure out what your boundaries are and practice setting them. A therapist can help you if you struggle with this skill.

4. Love Yourself – Prioritize Your Own Needs

Prioritizing your needs goes hand in hand with setting boundaries. Remember, you have every right to take care of yourself first before tending to others, and you are not selfish for doing so. It’s completely reasonable for you to seek your own comfort, safety, and happiness, even if this requires setting boundaries and telling people “no” sometimes.

5. Talk To A Therapist

Talk therapy can be an invaluable tool in healing from any type of trauma, including intimate partner violence. A therapist can help you identify your triggers, set boundaries, and create better self-care strategies. Moreover, if you also suffer from anxiety, PTSD, depression, or another mental health condition as a result of being abused, she can help you find ways to cope.

Domestic Violence Therapist In Glendale

If you’re a survivor of domestic abuse or intimate partner violence, don’t do Valentine’s alone this year. Dr. Taji Huang can help you regain a sense of safety and control in your life. She offers anxiety, PTSD, and domestic violence counseling in Glendale, CA. Contact her office today to schedule an appointment.

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Make Marriage Counseling Your New Year’s Resolution https://www.drtaji.com/marriage-counseling-new-years-resolution/ Tue, 14 Dec 2021 20:59:23 +0000 https://www.drtaji.com/?p=1094 There’s never a “wrong” time to make a resolution to improve your marriage, but many people feel inspired to do so at the beginning of the year. If you want to make improving your marriage your New Year’s resolution, Dr. Taji Huang offers couples counseling in Glendale, CA. New Year’s Resolutions For Couples Learn Your […]

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There’s never a “wrong” time to make a resolution to improve your marriage, but many people feel inspired to do so at the beginning of the year. If you want to make improving your marriage your New Year’s resolution, Dr. Taji Huang offers couples counseling in Glendale, CA.

New Year’s Resolutions For Couples

  • Learn Your Partner’s Love Language
  • Intentionally Be More Thoughtful
  • Make Time For Intimacy
  • Learn New Things About Each Other
  • Practice Mindfulness & Appreciation
  • Schedule Time To Discuss Finances
  • Consider Couples’ Therapy

Learn Each Others’ Love Languages

Sometimes, couples who love each other very much encounter relationship issues because each partner has a different “language” of how they prefer to give and receive love. For instance, some people prefer verbal affirmation of their partner’s love for them, whereas others feel more loved when their partner is physically affectionate or spends quality time with them.

Avoid Couple Fights With Better Communication

If each partner only sticks to their own preferred love language, then one or both of you might feel neglected or unloved if your preferences differ. This doesn’t mean you don’t love each other; it just means that better communication is needed.

By learning each other’s love languages, you can be more attuned and thoughtful towards each other, which will deepen your relationship and allow both of you to feel more loved.

Practice Being Intentionally Thoughtful

Despite what romantic movies would have us believe, true love takes work, and it’s not always going to be effortless. There will be days when you’re both tired and annoyed with one another, but continuing to do the little things that make each other happy intentionally will strengthen your marriage and make both of you happier in the long run.

This goes hand in hand with becoming attuned to each other’s love languages—you can both practice intentionally expressing love in the way the other person prefers, even if it’s not what you’re used to.

Make Time For Intimacy

After the honeymoon stage has ended, and you’re both juggling careers, chores, and childcare, it can be hard to maintain physical and emotional intimacy in your marriage. Many couples find it beneficial to schedule time in their calendars for romantic dinners, fun outings with each other, and physical intimacy.

The key is to prioritize your relationship and set aside time that’s just for the two of you.

Learn About One Another

Even if you’ve been married for years or decades, you and your spouse can still discover new things about each other in order to keep the relationship fun and exciting. People change over time, and this can actually be good for your marriage because it means that you’ll never run out of opportunities to learn about and grow with your spouse.

Practice Mindfulness & Appreciation

In a long-term relationship, it’s easy to get caught up in everything from major disagreements to minor habits that you find annoying about each other. When you’re constantly fixating on the negative, it can make you feel like you should never have gotten married in the first place or like your relationship is doomed.

However, you and your spouse surely have positive qualities that brought you together. By focusing on each other’s positive attributes, you can recreate the happier stages of your relationship.

Remember Why You Fell In Love

By consciously cultivating a heart of appreciation and reminding yourselves of why you fell in love with one another, you can bring the loving feelings and marital peace back. Try making a list of happy memories and things you appreciate about each other—you can look back at this regularly to feel more connected.

Or, during a moment when you feel peaceful and happy around each other, take a couple of minutes to tune into your emotions and senses in order to fully enjoy each other’s presence and the time you’re spending together.

Schedule Time To Talk About Money

Financial disputes are one of the leading causes of divorce, and the only way to prevent or settle these disagreements is to talk about them openly and honestly. If it’s hard for both of you to spontaneously sit down and talk about finances, you may want to consider setting aside time to have these conversations on a weekly, biweekly, or monthly basis.

Remember to stay respectful and avoid using accusatory or passive-aggressive language—the goal is for both of you to tackle the problem as a team rather than attack each other.

Consider Couples’ Counseling

Many couples avoid going to therapy for as long as possible because they feel like it should only be a last resort to prevent a divorce or because they feel like their relationship is no longer salvageable. However, marriage counseling isn’t just for relationships that are crumbling, and it can help relatively happy couples develop an even stronger bond with one another.

Moreover, even if your conflicts feel unresolvable, working with an unbiased third party might actually help save your marriage.

Experienced Relationship Therapist In Glendale

Whether you want to resolve conflicts and resentment to keep your marriage alive, or you’re just trying to get out of a relationship rut, Dr. Taji Huang can assist. She is a licensed psychologist and counselor with extensive experience helping couples communicate more effectively, see from each other’s perspectives, and feel more connected with each other.

Contact her office today to schedule a session.

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How To Get Through Your First Christmas After A Death https://www.drtaji.com/your-first-christmas-after-a-death/ Wed, 24 Nov 2021 22:32:21 +0000 https://www.drtaji.com/?p=1089 Losing a loved one can make the holiday season unbearable. Even years after bereavement, the emotional wounds may still feel new, especially during special occasions that stir up old memories and remind you of your loss. Although you may feel hopeless or like the pain will never end, Dr. Taji Huang can help you make […]

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Losing a loved one can make the holiday season unbearable. Even years after bereavement, the emotional wounds may still feel new, especially during special occasions that stir up old memories and remind you of your loss. Although you may feel hopeless or like the pain will never end, Dr. Taji Huang can help you make it through the first Christmas after a loved one’s passing.

Tips To Cope With Grief During The Holidays

  • Remember That Grief Can Manifest In Many Ways
  • Know That Any Emotions Are Valid
  • Create Traditions To Honor Your Loved One
  • Set Boundaries
  • Reach Out To Loved Ones For Support
  • See A Therapist

Know That Grief Can Manifest In Many Ways 

People often talk about the “five stages of grief,” but it’s important to remember that grief is often nonlinear—you might not experience all of them, or you might repeatedly find yourself experiencing a particular stage. Moreover, different people experience grief differently, and your emotional experience doesn’t have to match that of the rest of your family.

Understand That Your Emotions Are Valid

Grief can bring up any number of emotions—sometimes simultaneously or in rapid succession—and all of them are valid. Whether you feel uncomfortable because the people around you are pressuring you to be cheerful and festive, guilty or ashamed about experiencing moments of holiday joy despite your loved one being gone, angry that the festivities are going on without them, or numb and unable to process what’s happening, know that there’s nothing wrong with you for feeling however you’re feeling.

Create A Special Tradition To Honor Your Loved One

Holiday rituals and traditions can be deeply meaningful ways to commemorate those who have left us. For instance, some families may find solace in cooking their loved one’s favorite meal, displaying a special ornament that represents them, or lighting a candle in their memory. These traditions can help us find peace while reminding us of the love and memories that will always exist in our hearts.

Set Boundaries

You don’t have to attend every holiday celebration or event that your friends, coworkers, and acquaintances invite you to, especially if it’s too overwhelming or painful. It’s okay to set boundaries and give yourself space to feel your feelings at your own pace.

Ask Loved Ones For Support

Even if you feel deeply lonely, you don’t have to suffer alone. You might wish to consider reaching out to friends and family to let them know you’re having a hard time.

Talk To A Professional Therapist

While it’s true that grief is a testament to your love, and that it may come and go in waves, that doesn’t have to preclude you from healing, finding peace in your own heart, and being able to cope with the holiday season once again. Sometimes, prolonged grief can turn into clinical depression, which can continue for years or even decades, but therapy can help you heal. Also, your loved one would want you to find healing and relief from your suffering.

Professional Grief Counseling In California

Grief makes the holidays hard, especially the first year after losing someone you love dearly. Dr. Taji Huang is a professional psychologist and depression therapist in Glendale. Contact her office today to schedule an appointment.

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Manage OCD Over The Holidays https://www.drtaji.com/manage-ocd-over-the-holidays/ Mon, 25 Oct 2021 07:28:46 +0000 https://www.drtaji.com/?p=1082 If obsessive compulsive disorder (OCD) is causing you to dread the upcoming holiday season, Dr. Taji Huang can help you overcome your fears in Glendale, CA. With over a decade of experience in cognitive behavioral therapy and exposure therapy, she can help you finally have some peace of mind. How To Manage OCD This Holiday […]

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If obsessive compulsive disorder (OCD) is causing you to dread the upcoming holiday season, Dr. Taji Huang can help you overcome your fears in Glendale, CA. With over a decade of experience in cognitive behavioral therapy and exposure therapy, she can help you finally have some peace of mind.

How To Manage OCD This Holiday Season

  • Learn To Accept The Uncertainty
  • Confide In A Trusted Loved One
  • Seek Professional Help

Sit With The Uncertainty

At its core, OCD is about trying to alleviate uncertainty, anxiety, and other negative emotions. Oftentimes, the key to breaking the obsessive-compulsive cycle is learning to accept your feelings and carry on with your life without trying to eliminate uncertainty and doubt.

Holiday Stress Can Trigger Unique Obsessions

  • “What if I contract an illness from a relative by hugging them or unwrapping a gift?”
  • “What if I accidentally give everyone food poisoning at the holiday dinner?”
  • “What if I don’t really love these relatives?”
  • “What if I spontaneously harm my nieces, nephews, or grandchildren?”
  • “What if I don’t recite this holiday prayer perfectly, and what if that’s religious blasphemy?”

Talk To A Loved One

Many people with OCD have seemingly bizarre or socially taboo obsessions, so they sadly go years without discussing their struggles due to immense shame, guilt, and fear. You may worry that your obsessions make you a “bad person” (even though this isn’t true!) and that others will judge you for their thoughts.

This can lead to severe feelings of isolation and depression, especially around the holidays and other types of group or family get-togethers.

Turn Anxiety Into Opportunity

Even though the crowds, activities, and questions can all make Thanksgiving and Christmastime hard, you might get more chances to connect with the people you trust and feel safe with. Sometimes, simply working up the courage to talk to a loved one about your obsessions can make you feel less ashamed and more connected.

Constantly asking someone for reassurance can become a compulsion, so it’s important to find a balance between doing this and sitting with the uncertainty.

Consult A Mental Health Professional

If you feel like your obsessions are ruling your life, a therapist or psychologist can teach you healthy coping skills to get you through the holidays and beyond. Exposure and response prevention (ERP) is considered the most effective way to treat OCD, as it teaches you to sit with uncertainty without resorting to compulsions. Many people also find cognitive behavioral therapy helpful.

Your therapist will evaluate your condition and lifestyle and help you find solutions that work for your unique situation.

Don’t Let OCD Attack What You Value Most

One particularly torturous feature of this disorder is that it often generates obsessions related to whatever matters most to those who suffer from it. Thus, if you have harm-related or moral obsessions, this doesn’t actually mean that you’re a bad or dangerous person! In fact, your obsessive fear is probably a manifestation of the fact that you care deeply about others’ well-being.

Less Commonly Discussed OCD Subtypes

As previously mentioned, OCD can have many manifestations other than the stereotypical “hand-washing” and “lock-checking.” If you know something is wrong and is affecting your life, you may need help with one of these lesser known types of obsessive compulsive disorder before, during, or after warm weather festivities.

Harm OCD:

  • Fear of being irresponsible and accidentally causing harm to others.
  • Fear of “losing control” and attacking someone.
  • Worrying that you might secretly be “evil” and that others aren’t safe around you.
  • Fear of spontaneously harming or killing yourself, even though you have no actual desire to do so.

Postpartum OCD

  • Fear of accidentally or intentionally hurting your baby.
  • Constantly worrying that something terrible will happen to your baby.

Scrupulosity OCD

  • Fear of sinning against your religious, ethical, or moral beliefs.
  • Feel like you have to confess every “bad” thought or action to another person.
  • Constantly wondering whether having “bad” thoughts makes you a “bad” person.

Relationship OCD

  • Worrying that you “don’t really love” your spouse, partner, or another family member.
  • Worrying that something is wrong with your relationship, even when everything’s going well.

Sexual Orientation & Transgender OCD

  • Obsessively questioning your sexual orientation or gender identity, and feeling distressed about the uncertainty.

Existential OCD

  • Constantly questioning the meaning of life or nature of existence and being unable to shake off these obsessions.

Somatic OCD

  • Being hyper-aware of a physical sensation or automatic process (such as blinking), and feeling like you’re “going crazy” because you can’t stop thinking about it.

Get A Quality OCD Counselor In Glendale, CA

OCD is a truly debilitating condition that can affect every aspect of your life. Dr. Taji Huang can help you enjoy the holidays without becoming caught up in the obsessive-compulsive cycle. Contact her office today to schedule an appointment.

<p>The post Manage OCD Over The Holidays first appeared on Dr. Taji Huang PhD.</p>

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ADHD & Anxiety: Understanding the Connection https://www.drtaji.com/adhd-anxiety-understanding-the-connection/ Tue, 21 Sep 2021 22:51:45 +0000 https://www.drtaji.com/?p=1074 Anxiety and ADHD can both drastically affect all areas of your life, including your relationships, education, and professional advancement. Moreover, research shows that having ADHD significantly increases your risk of having anxiety as well. If you’re struggling with both of these conditions in Glendale, CA, Dr. Taji Huang can help you take back your life. […]

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Anxiety and ADHD can both drastically affect all areas of your life, including your relationships, education, and professional advancement. Moreover, research shows that having ADHD significantly increases your risk of having anxiety as well. If you’re struggling with both of these conditions in Glendale, CA, Dr. Taji Huang can help you take back your life.

What Is ADHD?

ADHD is an extremely common neurodevelopmental condition that begins in childhood and continues throughout your life, although the way the symptoms manifest themselves may change as you age. Psychologists currently recognize three main types of ADHD:

  • Inattentive Type (Formerly Known As ADD)
  • Hyperactive-Impulsive Type
  • Combined Type

Signs You May Have ADHD

  • You often feel restlessness, are constantly “on the go,” have a hard time unwinding, or can’t seem to relax.
  • You have a hard time falling asleep because your mind is so active.
  • You rush through tasks, impulsively buy things, or find it hard not to interrupt people.
  • You hate waiting in lines, so you avoid going to stores when they’re busy.
  • You feel really uncomfortable and fidgety if you have to sit still for too long, or you were a hyperactive child.
  • You forget important information and deadlines easily.
  • You can’t multitask.
  • You find it difficult to stay organized or manage your time.
  • You have a hard time staying focused.
  • You sometimes hyperfocus on certain things.
  • You get frustrated or bored easily, feel depressed, or have frequent mood swings.
  • You are much more easily hurt or embarrassed by rejection and criticism than other people.
  • People sometimes accuse you of being “lazy” and “careless” even though you tried really hard.
  • These symptoms have been around since you were little.

ADHD & Anxiety Are Linked

Anxiety disorders are actually the most commonly diagnosed co-occurring conditions for people with ADHD. Anxiety can also be a common side effect of prescription ADHD medications, such as Adderall and Ritalin.

Moreover, many individuals with ADHD are constantly worried and stressed about their performance at work or school, since ADHD makes it so much harder to stay organized and meet deadlines. This can create a vicious cycle where the ADHD symptoms can make you more anxious, and then anxiety makes it even harder to focus.

Common Anxiety Symptoms

  • Often Feeling Nervous, Worried, Or Tense
  • Constantly Overthinking Things
  • Restlessness, Irritability, & Feeling “On Edge”
  • Insomnia
  • Fatigue
  • Rapid Heart Rate
  • Nausea & Gastrointestinal Issues
  • Numbness, Tingling, Or Pins & Needles
  • Trembling & Shaking
  • Muscle Tension
  • Throat Or Chest Tightness
  • Dry Mouth
  • Headaches
  • Dizziness
  • Lightheadedness
  • Chills
  • Hot Flashes
  • Chest Pain
  • Panic Attacks

Request ADHD Accommodations

If you’ve been officially diagnosed with ADHD and your symptoms make it hard to function at school or work, you are entitled to reasonable accommodations under the Americans with Disabilities Act.

For instance, if you’re a student, you may be able to request extra time on exams and assignments, note-taking assistance, or permission to take tests in a quiet room by getting in touch with your school’s disability resources office. If you’re an employee, you might also be able to request a quiet workspace, extra breaks, permission to use noise-canceling headphones, and fewer interruptions from coworkers.

ADHD & Social Anxiety Disorder

Many people with ADHD were frequently shamed, bullied, and rejected as children because they were wrongly perceived as “lazy” or “rude” by adults and “different” by their peers. This puts them at a much greater risk of developing social anxiety disorder because they retain the fear that others will continue to reject and judge them in the future. Moreover, some people with ADHD experience a symptom called rejection sensitivity dysphoria (RSD), which makes criticism even more painful than it is for neurotypical people, which further exacerbates social anxiety.

Professional Anxiety Psychologist In Glendale

If you’re suffering from social anxiety or another type of anxiety disorder related to your ADHD, professional counseling can help tremendously. Dr. Taji Huang is a licensed psychologist and anxiety therapist with extensive experience treating many types of anxiety. Contact her Glendale office today to book an appointment.

<p>The post ADHD & Anxiety: Understanding the Connection first appeared on Dr. Taji Huang PhD.</p>

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